My pregnancy chronology (First Trimester)

I've hit week 39 of my pregnancy and am playing the waiting game with my little one now. Feels like a milestone achievement for my first pregnancy. After all i've been through these 9 months, i thought i might as well pen down my thoughts and experiences and lessons learned during this life-changing phase.

Starting off with my first semester of pregnancy whilst working was incredibly difficult. Thinking back, when people asked me if i had planned this pregnancy i should have replied "no". Reason being there is actually so much information available on the web nowadays and unless you are always surrounded by other moms or soon-to-be moms who are willing to share their experience and life knowledge, i doubt an exhausted working mom would have the energy and motivation to study up on all pregnancy related issues on a daily basis.

The mass media works a little too well in bombarding us with information of various accessories to purchase, and according to stages of pregnancy - multiple supplements to take, exercises, daily activities to stick to, and food and drinks for consumption, pre and post pregnancy insurance and medical plannings, etc, and this is even before we receive the wisdom from our elders on the do's and don'ts of being pregnant.

Consumption intake/ outtake pattern

In the first few weeks of my early pregnancy, things were relatively normal. Appetite was normal, and i had no particular aversion to any kinds of food. Starting week 4, slight aversion and light nausea kicked in. Things peaked at week 5, with full day nausea and strong aversions to almost every food i could see or smell, which pretty much carried on throughout until the end of my 4th month of pregnancy.

High for the period - Was discovering that liquid cereal drinks, yakult, berries (all types, especially blueberries), cream crackers, soya bean drinks, citrus fruits such as golden kiwis, lemon juice, tomatoes and oranges, all lightly cooked vegetables, cold cooked foods (chap fan with tofu and vege), nothing spicy, were gentle enough on my stomach and could encourage my appetite, which was generally 1 meal a day and snacks in between.

Low for the period - Heavily relying on citrus foods caused me to experience frequent gastrointestinal reflux, and discovering too late that processed tomatoes such as carton tomato juices or canned tomato puree in itself would drastically escalate the acidity level in my intestines. Learned the hard way as well that pineapple and sugar cane water was a big no-no during pregnancy. Also, it seemed like junk food was the other alternative food i could stomach down - maggi goreng (lunctime at work, almost 3 times a week), potato chips and gatorade (for all meals for 2 full days).

Other challenges during this period

• Breaking the news to my family, friends and colleagues at week 5 day 5. Reason: Had to take an ultrasound to check on status of the fetus due to unexpected bleeding from breakdown of a section of the uterine wall. Diagnosed with threatened pregnancy and told to take 2 days MC. Not a good way to start of on the probation period of my new job.
• The fact that my nausea would peak generally at lunchtime daily, and that drinking water would in itself induce me to throw up anything and everything in my tummy, supplements of hormonal medicine and Obimin + included. The next "cycle" would be generally be once in the evening and once later after 10pm. This being the minimal number of times daily with the maximum being 6 times a day, everyday. 
• Add in weekly constipation for an exhausting experience ahead. 
• Educating my parents on the foods i could and could not and should not take during this pregnancy, considering that mom served me pineapple lychee konyakku jelly on 1 occasion as dessert.
• Got the flu, fever and cough for 2 weeks due to exposure within the family. Horribly difficult  to recover considering there is so much medication that we cannot take during pregnancy. 
• Constant sleepless nights from nightmares, and fear of loss arising from this sudden transition, coupled with the thoughts of the choices i may need to make if things do not improve - my baby or my job.
• The fear of throwing up each time constantly causing strong uterine contractions may actually harm and evict my little one. 
• Difficulty memorizing things and focusing at work. Near impossible to socialize at work too especially since everyone unwinds only during lunchtime. Constant exhaustion and tendency to need a nap during lunctime to be able to last throughout the day, even if it meant sleeping in the car in the parking basement since the office air-conditioning was pretty cold.

"Memorable" moments

• Discovering the tiny life form swimming about inside of me and hearing its steady heartbeat for the first time. The mixture of emotions was in between fear, confusion, concern, delight, and awe.
• The 2 instances where i had cold canned sardine in tomato sauce for breakfast. Yeap, fresh from the Ayamas can in the pantry, no heating required. For a person that barely ate more than half a cooked sardine on the rare occasions it is served pre-pregnancy, this was something unexplainable to me.
• Thankfully, i discovered that the cure to my never-ending phlegm and headache during my flu period was due to heatiness of the body from trying to follow tradition too strictly and having avoided all cooling foods/drinks. Immediately cured within 3 days after taking the necessary herbs and drinks to balance back my body.
• Best way to stimulate my appetite - take a bite from whatever hubby is having. Somehow, his food choices always seem more delectable, be it fried rice or curry chicken. Well, at least hubby can't blame me for fattening him up by ordering food and not finishing them instead!
• Managed to "hijack" hubby's FoFi whilst he drove my Viva to work instead as i needed a more comfortable ride to and from office.
• Cleared of the "threatened pregnancy" status after week 10 of visiting the O&G, Dr Pauline Pue, at SJMC.
• Discovering i lost 2kg during this period, but managed to steadily gain back that weight and that baby was growing fine inside me despite the constant struggles i was having.

During this 3 months i had pretty much no time at all to read up on pregnancy related materials or seek support from groups or forums on such matters. Weekends were spent doing trial-and-error on foods and trying to catch back up on sleep from the exhausted week. Although my office was filled with moms and dads, asking them pregnancy related questions seemed to sometimes turn them off and they would direct me to google instead of sharing their own experiences eventhough they offered assistance in the first place. 

Truth be told, despite the support my hubby and family were giving me, it really felt like i was taking on this challenge alone, with no better alternative in sight and constantly just trying to desperately stay positive and hope for the best. I know everyone's pregnancy is different but constantly being judged and assumed that i was actually well informed but yet made such mistakes was depressing to say the least. In the end, it really felt like the weight of all blames shifted to me and the feeling of being cornered got stronger everyday, especially when there are also people out there aiming for the opportunities to "nail" you down already.

On the flip side, i received encouragement that things normally do improve by the second trimester, although it may vary from pregnancy to pregnancy. So by the end of my 3rd month, here's to hoping for a better turnaround in my second trimester.